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20 Bananas

June 18, 2012

First things first, I did not die of potassium poisoning.

Second thing second, twenty bananas is a lot of food. Here is how I decided to divide them up: five for breakfast, seven for lunch, two for an afternoon snack, six for dinner.

After breakfast I felt great, until 9:55 when I got seriously hungry.  This is how I was feeling by lunch time:

I ate lunch with two students I had put in detention.  I sat there and talked to them about taking responsibility for their actions, making good decisions, etc… they rolled their eyes, nodded at all the wrong times, slumped in their chairs obviously waiting for me to be done lecturing them.  The guy in charge of discipline came in and gave them a good talk while their eyes glazed over and they gradually slid below table height in their chairs.

I was wondering if we should check their vital signs to make sure they were alive when one finally piped up, “Why did you just eat seven bananas?”  I guess he was going to be ok.

I was stuffed by the time I finished lunch, and felt pretty good.  I was hungry here and there for the rest of the day, but nothing serious.

I ate two bananas before jogging.  The only hard part was deciding which one to eat first.  See my dilemma?

During the run I felt somewhat crappy.  I expected to feel great, but the first two miles were a struggle.  I had energy but kept getting side aches and had a headache to boot.

That night I had some digestive discomfort. A lot of gas, if you really must know.  It lasted for 24 hours.

And now for poop.  Truth is, if you eat a bunch of bananas, you produce something that looks startlingly like a bunch of bananas.

Cost: $7

Taste: Pleasant

Performance: sub par

Fulness Factor: low.

X Factor: A highly portable food individually wrapped with a sterile and biodegradable  miracle of science.

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